Excuse Notes From Parents

  1. These are actual excuse notes from parents to the school teachers (including original spelling) Collected by Nisheeth Parekh, University of Texas Medical Branch @ Galveston
  2. My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him
  3. Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot
  4. Dear School: Please excuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33
  5. Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating
  6. Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip
  7. John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face
  8. Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part
  9. Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins
  10. Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side
  11. Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels
  12. Please excuse Pedro from being absent yesterday. He had diahre dyrea direathe the shits
  13. Please excuse Tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea and his boots leak
  14. Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust
  15. Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father's fault
  16. I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because I don't know what size she wear
  17. Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday. Sally won't be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral
  18. My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the Marines
  19. Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well
  20. Gloria was absent yesterday as she was having a hangover
  21. Maryann was absent December 11-16, because she had a fever, sore throat, headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn't the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, what do you think?

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